Remember this one?

John Travolta plays Michael the archangel, or or Michael the space alien depending on which scientology joke you go with. Two tabloid reporters are dispatched by Bob Hoskins to bring him from Iowa to Chicago. On the way, they deal with old ladies dying, Michael’s fetish for ‘world’s largest whatevers,’ bar fights, and learning how to love, or some such nonsense. That’s not important.

What is important is that at one point in the movie, Michael bangs the chick from Chasing Amy. She exits their motel room appearing to have had the night of her life, and no further thought is given. There’s another scientology joke in there somewhere.

But wait… haven’t we heard about angels banging human females before? From Hebrew folklore? Their unions begat giant offspring known as Nephilim. And according to a cursory google image search, they looked like this-

Suddenly, I want to see a sequel.

I wasted a good minute of my life messing with this. Quite frankly, I’m shocked I didn’t waste more.

Have fun. For a minute or more.

There aren’t many actors who can effectively pull off so many fight scenes that run full sprint toward the ludicrous. This video details the industry leader.

Warning: Not for weak stomachs

Also, thanks to my beautiful wife, I now own a set of those throwing knives.

Ever have one of these days? I have a lot of these days.

Every once in a while, I run across a bit of nostalgia. Apparently, they’re making a whole book based on my misadventures of childhood.

And here I thought Australians had to be hardcore. This looks easy.

…This is only a test. Had this been an actual post, it would be far more entertaining.

Of course we all know that in reality, chainsaws would be a poor choice for anti-zombie warfare. They’re heavy, they run on precious fuel, and they sling contagious gore everywhere. But it’s always good to see that manufacturers are getting into the anti-zombie line of weaponry. So… kudos for effort.

This.

Every picture tells a story.

This one tells an epic.