state of the union
Tuesday January 29th 2008, 10:04 am
Filed under: Random bits of cheese

I didn’t actually watch last night’s state of the union address, nor do I care what was said. I had more important things to do. Like counting dead ants or something. I hate politics. But I don’t believe any of that leaves me unqualified to make my own commentary over it, as I could do just as well as any other address commentary I’ve seen over the years. I’ll just have to add my own self-interested crap like they do.

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What is it about the back of Bush’s head that always interests Cheney so much? This isn’t the first time we’ve seen this.

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“Psst! Ted- You forgot your pants again!”

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A second after this photo was taken, zombie Hillary laid waste to that poor man’s jugular vein. Don’t believe she’s a zombie? Check out her horde-

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“BRRRRAAAAIIIIIINSSSS!!!!!!”

ted2.jpg

“Ted, seriously. All my other supporters wear pants to political functions.”

bigfoot.jpg

Here we have a figure caught midstride in a blurry photo. Remind you of anything?

Please note: I’m not suggesting the first lady is actually bigfoot. That’s a different kind of blog. I’m just saying it’s not a flatering pose. Now we break for some gratuitous destruction-

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…And we’re back.

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What I see here is a Bond-esque supervillain scene. That’s the suave spy Sen. Langevin strapped to a chair as Hillary foolishly spills her entire evil plan to him.
-“You’ll never get away with this Clinton!”
-“Of course I will. Not that you’ll live to see it! HAhahahaha!”
Then Langevin ejects blades out of his sleeves to cut his binding, and slays all her evil henchmen. Or he would, if Hillary had any actual supporters.

ted3.jpg

“See Ted? That man over there remembered his pants.”

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As Bush gives ’em the old razzle dazzle, Cheney’s unflinching gaze continues to burn into the back of his head, and Pelosi decides it’s a good time to finish reading Harry Potter.

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-“Psst, Brock!”
-“That’s Barak
-“Yeah. Um… Hillary over there keeps eyeballing me. Can I borrow your pants?”


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