Friday September 30th 2005, 9:12 pm
Filed under: General Skullduggery

…In college, it’s an art form. Something to be nurtured to show one’s creativity and resourcefulness. For instance: lying to my suitemate to fill my bedroom and bathroom with shrimp over spring break so it stinks like roadkill in the sun is pretty damn creative and resourceful. Kudos to two girls named Whitney and Sara for that. As for my roommate and I, our resorcefulness in pranking is equalled only by our sense of revenge. On a weekend when their room would be empty, they were sure to lock the door. But living on the fourth floor, they overlooked the window. Silly them. We rappeled in through the roof, and did this-

Cedar chips and balloons covering the floor in the sink area. Turns out Sara’s allergic to cedar. And this is how she found out. She still hasn’t paid the medical bill we sent her for allergy assessment.

The rest of the balloons. We had trouble closing the door.

Bedroom floor covered in confetti and silly string. Not easy to vacuum.

One of two tubs of chive and onion cream cheese we left open. This one we deliberately left easy to find. The other not so much.

Kool Aid in the bathtub. We’re bastards like that.

Jell-O in the toilet bowl. We’re even bigger bastards like that.

Laundry soap in the toilet tank waiting for the water to be turned back on. There’s no end to our bastardy, is there?

We also turned off the air, and put flour in the vents. And filled the shower head with shave gel. Then we left a nice note on the mirror, and ordered a revenge pizza. Customary when pulling off something like this. These pictures are only from the biggest job we’ve pulled as of yet. We’ve also covered half a room in aluminum foil, shrinkwrapped cars, and blocked doors with garbage bags holding newspaper clippings to the door until it is opened. We’ve also blocked doors with a wall of paper plates, duct tape, and barricades. With all the planning that went in to this one, I can’t help but feel that we should be pulling bank heists. It would probably pay better.

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You guys aren’t just bastards. You’re dirty bastards but, you know, the ones who say this and aren’t you are only wishing they had thought of it first.

Comment by Nicci 10.03.05 @ 4:31 pm

Come on buddy! Give us a little more credit than THAT!! Shrimp, yeah…we not only put shrimp in your room, we ducttaped them to places you would NEVER find (I guarantee they are still there, unnoticed…including in the vent, up near the ceiling of the closet, and underneath desks and drawers) as well as putting shrimp in your sink, and hanging shrimp on strings from your ceiling! You also failed to credit us with putting glitter in your vent, jello in YOUR toilet (first, I might copied us!), switching clothes and stuff from your and your roommate’s closets and drawers, and diassembling your shower head…all after tricking you guys into letting us into your room AFTER you had left for an entire week! Oh! And don’t forget freshman year, when you had left to take one of your final exams…and we emptied 6 cans of silly string all over your room, put packing peanuts in your bed, as well as tons of easter grass in your roommate’s bed, put easter grass in your drawers, shredded newspaper in your laundry hamper and all over the floor, and last but CERTAINLY not least….took out ALL of your ceiling tiles and stacked them in a pile on the floor! (and only you know how deceitful it all was since you know how I gained access to your room MUHAHAHA!!) I just look sweet and innocent.

Comment by Whitney 10.19.05 @ 12:56 am

Your website lies…

Comment by Whitney 10.19.05 @ 12:59 am

Yep. All true. Except we did find the all the shrimp. And the glitter never came out. Also, you forgot to mention the irony in the newpaper clippings being the same we used to block the door. Send me those pictures, and you’ll get all the glory you deserve. Like I said, it’s an art form.

Comment by Siege 10.19.05 @ 11:29 am

Merciful heavens, remind me to never, ever piss of a college student. [img][/img] I bow to greater pranksters than me.

Comment by Emy's Stepmom 04.15.06 @ 4:27 pm

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